First of all, excuse me if any of the English you read here doesn’t make any sense to you, I’m a Chinese and English is not my native language, even though I can communicate pretty well, still as written language I’m not so good at it.
I want to talk about being a Christian, for any Christians and for myself.
One night about 3years ago before my husband and I went to bed I asked him : “ why are you acting so weird all day? What happened?”
here was his answer :“ people have told me that Chinese and Americans are different, I never thought so until lately….”
I stopped him and stared into his eyes said, “ don’t you scare me, what in the world are you talking about?”
so he answered quietly “ you are my wife and I love you very, very much, I want to be with you forever but what do you think about after death? Where do you think we’ll go?”
I was taking it easy and said “ I don’t care about after death, I just want to cherish this life, here, right here with my family and friends.”
He said “ this is why I am not happy today and recently…I don’t want to separate from you and I don’t want to hide the truth from you. Hell is a real place and people who don’t know the truth go there and they don’t die they get burnt. I don’t want you to go there but I don’t know how to tell you.”“ just tell me, I want to know.”
I sat up and my mind was widely awake. I love him so much that I am always eager to listen to him, even though sometimes he doesn’t make any sense.“ I have been reading my Bible mother gave me because I am so bored here having nothing to do, and yes I have studied many other religions including Buddhism, Taoism, and they are not real, they are not right. Only when you know Jesus Christ do you get to know life and get reborn again. Only when you know Him the only God in the whole universe will you go to heaven. For short, God has sent his only son to this world to save all the sinners, you, me, everyone in this world, he died for us, on the cross. And this is the truth.”
“ well, I know the story of Adam and Eve and Jesus, but I am a Buddhist.”“ do you believe that Jesus died for us?”“ yes I think so.”“ then you are not a Buddhist!!”
Boy he was screaming loud.So we got up from the bed and decided to check this out on the net, I was so new and I really had no idea what it was about.So we found this website where has all kinds of stuff about Christianity, I clicked on some videos of Ron Wyatt’s and testimonies, they are still not convincing to me, right before I got tired here came one special article about the blood they found at the place where Jesus was crucified, they were looking for some other things at first but they found this piece of hard black rock-like thing. So they sent it to the lab and it turned out to be human blood and the amazing part is from lab technology shows that the blood genes only show the mother side but no father side… this scared me totally and I was trembling at that moment.
We stayed up all night discussing this since my husband got saved not long before me. And as we were waiting for my visa to get through we decided to pray together every night, I didn’t know how to pray, what you should pray for. So I just took long talk with God, told him everything I wanted, asked him for forgiveness for what I had done before. I felt good.—this is really simple but that’s how I felt.
Then we came to America, where my husband’s family is. Before we came I knew that his mother and sister are very, very faithful Christians, I also prayed for that too, that I would be able to learn from them. My mother-in-law has taught me so, so much as well as my sister-in-law. But growing up is never easy, you know? Little kids need to fall to feel the pain and will never fall at the same place again, to me, being God’s new child is the same. I am an easy person, my mind doesn’t allow complex to go through, God knows, so I am not really taking a hard way to realize what Christianity is.
Christianity to me( I am not a preacher but I am just talking about myself) is my entire life, that is from the day I am reborn in Jesus Christ to the day I pay my debt. God walks with us, he is not absent because we don’t see him, I have experienced him so many times and some of them I don’t even remember. He never gives up as long as you have faith in him. I made my first Christian friend here in the U.S., who is also a Chinese, and very faithful too. She told me that her father used to beat her mother when she was younger and he still treated her badly now until about 2years ago she fell off the bed while sleeping and stayed unconscious for a month. My friend hurried back to China and she saw her dad with a different attitude. I told her, “you know what, God will take care of your mother, and your father, don’t worry.” She said “yes I know that for sure I just cannot stand for my unsaved dad to treat my saved mom that way.” That night I thought a lot and I think not only for Christians but those who have great love and kindness in their hearts will finally learn that what we are seeking is the truth of Jesus Christ. And this life we have here on earth is not only enjoying what we are given but also learn about ourselves. This is not about selfishness; this is about what we are created for, what we are capable of to serve the Lord. Take my friend’s dad for example and my life as well. I am not a patient person, I want something I get it. My parents have spoiled me pretty well, they give whatever I want, even when it is not good. So now, my heavenly Father is teaching me, it’s hard, yes it is very hard. But I know, he is doing this because he loves me. I want a baby so bad that sometimes I feel like grabbing somebody else’s. and this time, I don’t get it. My parents can’t help, my husband can only do his part, for me, there is nothing wrong with me, but I just can’t get pregnant. God has got me there, he knows who I am and what I desire. I have struggled for a very long time to find out why I can’t have a baby. So I came up with an idea: if He only wants me to have a baby when I am 40, now I am 25, am I going to trouble myself for 15 years? With knowing I am getting a baby? No, of course I’m not. Be patient.—He tells me. The same for my friend’s father, it took his whole life to realize that his wife is obedient and always there for him until she got sick. Then he looked back on what he had done. His heart ached. He is changing. God does miracles like this. She actually did get sick but the whole sickness thing changed her husband’s heart. Now I am still growing and learning about my dear Heavenly Father, everyday I wonder if he is pleased by what I do. For me, he has created me to serve my husband to be a good wife, maybe this is not what people think a big great job, I take it divinely and seriously for it is the command from God. I’m from my husband’s rib, thinking about it makes me giggle, it is the place close to his heart. All the time I learn to adapt myself to him, to make perfect “one” person. Christianity is love, life, family and Holy Spirit with Jesus Christ. When you have all of these, look up to the sky, you will see God’s smile. I pray that Father you give me strength everyday to grow, let me see who I am, tell me what you want me to do. I thank you for giving you Son to die for us and I thank you for the great love you sent as my husband.In Jesus name. Amen! Rebecca
